Adieu my dear friend!!

Its been more than a month, there has been so many attempts, but nothing saw the light of the day, nothing that I write can bring out the grief and the hollowness your loss has caused to us. It all still feels like some cruel joke, some kind of a bad dream. When I first heard it, I couldnt believe it. Someone who was always smiling, cracking his share of PJs, so full of life is suddenly no more.

Couldnt the truck driver, stop and rush you to some hospital? Couldnt the cop, instead of chasing the truck have attended to you? Couldnt the first hospital admit you? Couldnt the so called noble profession save you eventually? Couldnt you fight death a little longer? How can God even think about it? Is there really someone up there? This cannot be, how can you do this, like this fellow had his entire life infront of him. He was just 27.

Death as they say is a great leveller, we are all happy and proud one day, thinking of our achievements, sharing so many emotions thinking we rule this world, and then something like this comes up and you cannot do anything, you are bloody helpless. You feel like a loser. Yes thats exactly how am feeling all this while. Someone snatched you away from us, and we couldnt do anything. We just couldnt do anything.

I dont know if there is after life? But I want to believe in it. Coz I want to meet you, tell you how sorry Iam, how much we all miss you. Tell you that just one day before this fateful event, me and Sujith wanted to call you, but then we thought we would call you later. That day never came, the next day brought with it the sad news of your death.

I couldnt come and even see you one last time. I couldnt, I did not want to see you in that state, for me you could never be like that. The image I have of you is captured in my mind. Its your smiling face and no power on mother earth can wipe that out. Thats how I want to remember you. I want to remember all the lovely time we spent during the four years we were in college and the numerous times we met after college and ended up sloshed and called each other names.
I want to remember, the card games we used to play bunking lectures, us ragging the poor first years, us collecting money from hostel to arrange booze, the numerous rides on your bike, the nights when we burnt midnight oil preparing for exams, the Mohan Lal movies we saw, fighting our lives for the tickets,our final year dance performance, our copying assignments, your last ball six which won us the match against the Civil Team, and many many more moments worth their weight in gold.

As friends I never got the chance to tell you, how special you were, how lucky I was to be your friend. As time passes the angst will lessen, the injuries will heal, but your loss will always be felt.
I will meet you one day, then we will again pull each others legs, call each other names drunk and beyond making any sense, but this time I will surely tell you Vijesh how much I love you and that you have been more than a friend to me.
Wherever you are, always be happy and be smiling. As for us we will continue to miss you.
A bereaved friend.

PS: Vijesh met with an accident last month, on his way back from office near Marthalli Bangalore, where a truck went over him. He lay on the road bleeding for an hour before being taken to a hospital, where they refused to admit him, and by the time they rushed him to another, he was no more. Thus destiny snatched from us our friend, from a young boy his brother and from two proud parents their elder son.

Comments

Anonymous said…
I too heard news of a family member's demise today.

Hearing about death of someone, whom I knew closely, fills me with a strange emotion apart from sadness. I feel detached from everything for some time. I can't help imagining how that person must have felt while leaving all hopes, dreams and family behind.

I feel how everything is just so futile: this red pen, that black car, this green colored money, and those rosy colored dreams. How a person was talking and smiling at us and how he/she is gone after that split second; how nothing can ever be truly possessed or owned; how you can't be with someone forever; how we all are moving towards that inevitability. Why on earth then are we running this race doing mundane jobs, breathing every second, eating every day, struggling to achieve that special thing and more?

And then the feeling of loneliness engulfs. That someday, we all have to go alone...and more than that, after that perhaps we won’t know how and where our loved ones are.

(Sorry for all these sad words... but I heard the news today, and coincidentally read your blog after that. Couldn't help penning this.)

May your friend rest in peace.
Sreejit said…
Thanks Mita, and my heartfelt condolences to you too. A strange void fills in whenever you hear such news and takes you to a different world. You suddenly feel detached and helpless. But as they time heals, slowly we limp back to materialistic demands of this world.
The fact that everyone has the same fate doesnt dawn unless something like this happens and then you suddenly it gets you thinking.
Maverick said…
I lost a cousin of mine.She was going to her hostel with her friends in a car when a bus rammed into the car.It was a coincidence that they just celebrated Diwali at their college before returning so that they could go to their natives for vacation.
And its a bigger coincidence that on the fateful day,she put the following status message on her facebook account..that too via mobile !!!
"Perhaps in the books of destiny,there are no chance meetings..its all meant to be".I get an eerie feeling when I think she knew it was coming..

Death is terrible..
Moo said…
I'm so sorry for your loss. I know nothing I say can make the pain any lesser. Even time won't completely heal your wounds...however, it will make you a stronger person.

My heartfelt condolences to you. No one should have to go through this. Take care.

* hugs *
Sreejit said…
Thanks guys for the comments, it means a lot to me.
@Rajesh:
Heartfelt condolences to you buddy!! Death is really terrible!

@Moo:
Thank u tons!!

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